I haven’t typed up a blog in a while and every time I make promises to myself to keep some kind of regular journal, something else inevitably distracts me.
Anywho, I’ve been reading up on the differences between a gold digger and a silver digger throughout the internet for quite some time now and slowly connecting the dots of various “related” concepts about women and women behavior. Now, what brought me to this research is mainly certain types of female behavior that I’ve come to notice. In particular, certain very particular patterns that I’ve been seeing. And that is that women have the tendency to date men with money.
Now, this isn’t going to turn into those “a dime a dozen” blogs that talks trash about women and their behaviors. No. This journal entry is more of a “self-reflection” of sorts. It’s more of just merely observing my observations, so to speak.
On the one hand, I’ve read on various forums, blogs, and articles that “not all women are gold diggers.” On the other hand, I’ve also read plenty of other opposing forums, blogs, and articles that “all women are gold diggers.” Then, I came across another distinct terminology used for someone who “pretends” not to care about wealth but is rather more concerned about one’s ambitions, (read: money potential), and dates men who have that drive but doesn’t, at the present moment, have the wealth. They call these women “silver diggers”.
I can’t help but notice that silver diggers and gold diggers are essentially one and the same and that the difference is only that of “degree” rather than a totally different beast altogether. You see, I was brought upon this concept when talking to a female acquaintance who expressed that she’s not a gold digger but wants a man who is mature, responsible, a hard worker, but more importantly, has strong ambitions, even if he isn’t a millionaire or has a white collared job. And it just struck an idea I’ve held in my mind for the longest time and that is that this is essentially a different way to define “gold digger”. It’s the “politically correct” version of what we would normally call a gold digger. It’s kind of like how racism used to be overt but because of laws and changing cultural attitudes and norms, that racism has turned inward and has become covert. And it manifests itself in the form of institutional racism or color blind racism and other less obvious forms. Basically, one can definitely feel that it’s a type of wrong but because it doesn’t exhibit any of the “common faces” of that type of wrong, one can’t say, with any kind of certainty that it is what it feels like it is. At best, people would say that you’re being a bit too serious or can’t take a joke, and at the worst, it means that racists (or gold diggers, in this case) have figured out a way to be racist (or a gold digger) without saying it outright or acting it outright.
You can also see it as a type of passive-aggressive behavior but that’s another topic for another time. I’m just interested in drawing that parallel for the present point because both gold diggers and racists share one thing in common. They hide their intentions really well.
So the question is, if one were to encounter a gold digger and “at the face of it,” she genuinely seems like an all-around good person, all her friends and family speak highly of her, and the community at large all say the same as well, is she a gold digger? Or is she not a gold digger? I’m still inclined to say that all women are gold diggers, despite what she may say and despite what others may say.
The real question is, if the guy loses his job, would the gal stick around? And that’s a pretty big price to pay and find out later that all the “apparent affections” were all for show. That would really suck for the guy, if all the years he’s spent “loving” a gal turned out to be a farce because she wanted him only because he has the drive to make money even though he doesn’t presently have the wealth. I can’t imagine myself being caught up in such a situation but it is indeed very much possible that I could end up that way. It does make me question if I really want to continue dating women knowing this. I’ve heard too many horror stories as it stands from acquaintances, to old high school mates, to college mates, to folks older than me who have already been there and got so royally screwed over by the “love of their lives”.
I’ll be honest. I’m still on the fence about it. And that’s why I’m putting dating aside for now until I get things straightened out in my mind about the matter. I’ll still chat up women and I’ll still flirt but I don’t think I would take any of them any further beyond those initial phases for now. Looking back on my previous exes and reflecting on what has transpired, it kind of makes me think that I’ve dodged two silver bullets already and I don’t want to risk getting shot a third time. And I was ready to marry these women too but they ultimately left for one reason or another.
Anywho, I’ll talk more about my past some other time. For now, this will be it for tonight. Until next time…