A couple of weeks ago (or maybe a few weeks ago), I wrote an entry about this random Facebook gal who messaged me out of the blue and through an acquaintance I knew from the Facebook group Asians Not Brainwashed By Media. As it happens, I’ve been messaging this gal back and forth for the past couple (or a few) weeks since that first encounter and these conversations that we have just keep getting more and more bizarre. She talks a lot about eating funyuns, cake, and all manner of junk food that you can imagine. And, according to her, she suffers from bulimia, is an anorexic, and has made it a point to keep bringing up this subject matter like I give a damn (or that I should). But you know, in my moments of boredom, sure, I did humor her. Each and every time I joked about her eating habits, she gets upset and tells me to fuck off. And each and every time, I said to her that I wasn’t the one who started the conversation in begin with and that she is free to leave it any time she wants. (Of course, she never does. Or if she did, she’d come running back to me within the same hour).
And what strikes me as odd about this gal is that she enjoys acting like a child and expecting a reaction of some kind from me. (Read: Attention Whore). On her Facebook profile, she literally has over a 1,000 friends, most of which are guys and most of which just happen to be Asian or of Asian descent, and particularly, Japanese. (She appears to have some sort of fetish towards this group of Asians). On top of that, she’s accustomed to guys throwing themselves down at her (at least on Facebook) for just a smidgen of her attention. And I’m just like, ‘Wow….she’s not even that good looking.’ And she’s Black! Not that there’s anything wrong with Black women but…I’ll be straight with you. There aren’t that many Black women that I find attractive. For that matter, there aren’t that many White women that I find attractive either. And don’t take this the wrong way. There’s nothing wrong with either ethnic group. I just don’t particularly find either of them all that attractive to me. Asians, and particularly Chinese, have always been my default choice when it comes to dating. To a lesser extent, if they happen not to be Chinese, but they are some type or mix of Asian, I’d consider them as well.
Anyway, at some point, this gal whose screen name is Sue Takahashi (I’m pretty sure it’s a fake name)? We’ve talked dirty with each other. We’ve flirted with each other. We’ve cracked racial and politically incorrect jokes with each other. All that jazz. For the moments when we were still doing this, talking to her was fun. Then came “the talk.” You know this talk. This is the talk that every girl who is just a tad bit too insecure about herself that gets imposed on the guy when she wants to know how the guy feels about her. To be frank, I’ve never been in the situation where the gal would initiate this talk. Usually, I’m the aggressor, the chaser, the pursuer and whatever relations that I have with women are pretty clear cut. Either we’re dating or we’re not. And if not, I cut her loose and I get on with my life. End of story. And this has been my personal principle since my second ex. After her, I changed the way I dated women. It, more or less, goes something like this: I meet a woman. We get along. We talk and get to know each other. After some time of figuring out whether we have shared interests, values, and goals, I express feelings for her. If she feels something, we keep going. If she doesn’t feel anything or doesn’t feel the same way, I cut her loose and I move onto the next gal. Understandably so, in the latter cases, the gals get upset that I no longer shower them with attention or go out of my way to do stuff for them, if they asked. But, the way I see it, I’m looking out for number one. Me. If I ain’t happy in a situation, I’m not going to stick around and hope things change. In all likelihood, it won’t. She had her chance. And if she doesn’t take it, that’s it. She gets the boot and she’s out of my life permanently. Of course, on the off chance that we bump into each other down the line, I’ll keep things friendly but otherwise, I won’t go out of my way to re-engage with her, “catch up,” or continue talking with her beyond what is reasonable.
So this talk that we had? She pressured me to define the relationship. This internet relationship. Bear in mind now, she’s from Maryland. I’m from California. We’re both on opposing sides of the coast. East Coast versus West Coast. The likelihood of us ever meeting in person is next to nil. I decided on a whim to call her my girl. After all, I had enjoyed our previous conversations. Why the hell not? After I said that, our relationship changed. Gone are the dirty talks and crude jokes. The fun times ended right then and there. The very next day, she kept whining over and over and over about her tummy aching and how she just ate junk food that gave her an upset stomach. Then came the stickers. It was sticker after sticker of crying pandas, angry dogs, and weeping Hello Kitty’s. And our conversations just revolved around her whining and bitching about things that she refuses to change on her own or things that cannot be helped. At some point, I just “checked out.” Tired of her moaning about things that can’t be fixed. I just defaulted to answering her with stickers. Sticker after sticker with very little dialogue. And when I was feeling especially annoyed by her whining and bitching, I’d go along with it. I would agree with her state of despair. When she would bitch about her weight, like she says that she feels fat, I’d say that she is fat. If she said that her tummy ached and she’s in a lot of pain, I’d just “lol” and send her stickers of cats and dogs laughing at her. When she would bitch about being hungry, I’d send photo after photo of fried chicken, watermelons, and Kool-Aid just to mess with her.
If all this sounds like I’m being a total dick, I’m not. I’m not really giving it a whole lot of thought when responding to her messages. And she doesn’t seem to be taking any of it personally as she keeps messaging me so win-win, perhaps? I don’t know. At this point, she’s a liability and the fun just got sucked right out of it. It won’t be long before I cut her and permanently. I’m curious to see how long she can hold out with my trolling her whenever she whines about something. And it’s not like I didn’t make an effort to get to know her. It’s just that, invariably, those questions that I asked about her? She dodges them and talks about the things she’s feeling at the moment and whines about the same old stuff immediately after that when she runs out of “feelings to express.” She’s clearly not trying to let me in. In other words, she just wants attention, be positive or negative. It doesn’t matter to her. It’s all the same to her. When it comes to these types of people, I have no issues with being mean-spirited. It’s like, if you’re gonna whine about something, I hope it’s legitimate and you really plan on getting it resolved ASAP. Otherwise, if the whining continues and you don’t do anything about it to alleviate the problem, then I say that gives me permission to fuck with you. And that’s all I gotta say about that.